Watching
I watched in wonderment
at the appalling scene
playing out before me.
Shall we be so fearless
as to stand by and claim
nothing is wrong?
The ignorance and stupidity
you lash out in eager solitude—a joke
You stand tall in your selfish
appeal to fortify your grace
in his eyes
As I laugh in your bereavement
for lingering faults that you cannot see.
Watching
Accused
As I sit fumbling through my thoughts
with tears burning cuts into my eyes
I am left wondering numbly
why with such coldness
I am accused of doing what you do.
Why you are so determined
to put grief where none should be
And place blame on my heart
when it is yours that betrays love.
I sit grieved with pain of the condemned
for no wrong doing as if the scarlet letter
has be borne on my chest—my love
thrown back in my face
as if it is not enough that I love you.
But I do love you & though I know
your love is true it is a secondary love
that betrays more than one heart.
And how I wish & pray that you could see
The pain you cause by remaining in the past
holding on so tightly to what you can never
have back or even realize what you may lose in turn.
Alas I wonder would you care of the haunting dreams
I have of you…of her laughing at me for believing you will ever really be mine.